Wheat one-liners

If you're having difficulty convincing a loved one or someone else that wheat should be eliminated from the human diet, here are some useful one-liners to use:

Wheat makes your boobs big.
(This is true. Priceless for women to use on their husbands.)

Wheat causes dementia.
(And confirmed on examination of brain tissue at autopsy. Yes, autopsy.)

Wheat makes you look pregnant.
(The visceral fat of a wheat belly does a darn good imitation of a near-term infant.)

The first sign of wheat intolerance can be wetting your pants.
(Cerebellar ataxia, i.e., destruction and atrophy of the cerebellum, caused by wheat leads to loss of coordination and bladder control. Average age of onset: 53 years old.)

White flour bad, whole grain better; just as Marlboros are bad, Salems are better.
(The flawed syllogism that led to the "eat more healthy whole grain" colossal blunder.)

Wheat is the only food with its very own mortality rate.
(Celiac disease, osteoporotic hip fractures, and the neurologic diseases triggered by wheat can be fatal.)

"Wheat" is no longer wheat; it's the dwarf mutant that came from genetics research in the 1960s.
(Over 99% of all wheat today comes from the 18-inch tall dwarf mutant.)

Wheat increases blood sugar higher than nearly all other foods.
(Higher than Milky Way bars, higher than Snickers bars, higher than table sugar.)

There you have it: A full arsenal of one-liners to shoot at your husband, wife, or friend when they roll their eyes at your refusal to consume this thing called "wheat."

Comments (22) -

  • Anonymous

    11/26/2010 3:21:15 PM |

    Dr. Davis:

    As part of my low carb diet. When my family has pasta (2x per month or so) I have Dreamfields pasta which claims to "lock up" the carbs so they become indigestible. By testing, I know this does not cause a spike in my blood sugar like a normal pasta meal would. I have no wheat sensitivity at all that I can detect, but lately I've become concerned that this may still contribute to small particle LDL, even though it does not spike my blood sugar. Will I still have negative effects from eating this?  P.S. Sorry to be "Anonymous" but I'm not signed up for any of the other options.

  • Anonymous

    11/26/2010 3:53:36 PM |

    You need to test up to 5 hours after eating the pasta. It may be slowing, but not eliminating the spike

  • Lori Miller

    11/26/2010 4:07:33 PM |

    I find wheat to be an appetite stimulant, congesting, it leads to bloating, a few pounds of water weight gain, and a lot of crud on my teeth. If a slightly flatter chest is the price I have to pay to avoid all this, I call it a bargain.

  • Steve Cooksey

    11/26/2010 4:17:47 PM |

    ... but other than all those reasons....wheat's ok right? Cause we need fiber....right??

    LOL!!! I am a Type 2 Diabetic with normal blood sugar and CDE's have told me I should start eating grains.... for FIBER!

    I should take drugs & insulin ....for fiber...

    Thanks Dr. Davis!!!

  • Anand Srivastava

    11/26/2010 6:29:12 PM |

    So women who want big ones should eat wheat Wink. Just saying.

  • Anonymous

    11/26/2010 7:13:05 PM |

    "So women who want big ones should eat wheat Wink. Just saying."

    Didn't work for me!  I've had size A cup boobies before and after wheat.  I do have a nice, flat stomach now though so it was a net gain (loss actually)!

    I also got rid of allergies, skin problems, joint pains and other minor health complaints.

    To the person above eating Dreamfields pasta, it is still loaded with glutens, which cause a host of problems associated with wheat. It's not just the carb content of wheat that is bad.

  • Anonymous

    11/26/2010 7:17:13 PM |

    im a new persona after quiting wheat but doctor what are the usual minerals low in a person consuming wheat which they should supplement after stopping wheat... eg iron/iodine?

  • Dr. William Davis

    11/26/2010 8:41:01 PM |

    Hi, Anonymous--

    See Anonymous' response. It's right on.

    We've had mostly good experiences with the Dreamfields, though some have had modest increases in blood glucose.

  • Dr. William Davis

    11/26/2010 8:42:35 PM |

    Yet another Anonymous--

    Great question about the deficiencies that develop with wheat consumption.

    I'll cover that in an upcoming Heart Scan Blog post.

  • Ed

    11/26/2010 9:21:18 PM |

    As you say, "'Wheat' is no longer wheat".

    Here's a paper that shows varying wheat toxicity, as you observed with einkorn:

    "Natural variation in toxicity of wheat: potential for selection of nontoxic varieties for celiac disease patients."


    Different species and varieties, all (usually) called by the same name: not helpful for reality-based thinking.

  • Chris

    11/27/2010 1:34:46 AM |

    Robert DeNiro used Pasta to gain, what was it? 70lbs? for "raging Bull"
    ...worth an Oscar, I guess Smile

  • Eric Edberg

    11/27/2010 2:13:07 AM |

    "Wheat causes dementia."  What's the documentation for that?  I've read all over the place that the evidence for dementia causes, including dietary causes, is inconclusive.  (I also understand that big pharm would have us believe that the problem is insufficient levels of Namenda and Aricept, etc.)

    It's confusing.  My mother has significant dementia.  My dad had a huge belly, all sorts of diabetes complications, heart disease, etc., which killed him, but never developed dementia.  

    Anyway, enjoy your blog and am almost there on eliminating wheat from my diet.  


  • Desia

    11/27/2010 2:17:22 AM |

    The first sign of wheat intolerance can be wetting your pants.
    (Cerebellar ataxia, i.e., destruction and atrophy of the cerebellum, caused by wheat leads to loss of coordination and bladder control. Average age of onset: 53 years old.)
    Where can I find more info on the above? I've been googling but cannot find something substantial.

  • Dave

    11/27/2010 6:12:49 AM |

    I think it might be more catchy to think of "healthy whole grains" as the equivalent not of Salems but of "healthy low tar" cigarettes.

  • William Trumbower

    11/27/2010 12:06:29 PM |

    The increased visceral fat (wheat Belly) caused by the high wheat SAD does cause men to aromatize their testosterone to estradiol and get man-boobs, but in women it converts their estradiol to testosterone causing hair growth abnormalities etc.   The SAD causes men to look like women and women to look like men.

  • Dr. William Davis

    11/27/2010 1:50:41 PM |

    Hi, Eric--

    A clarification: I don't believe that I can argue that ALL dementia, or even most dementia, is caused by wheat. But the Mayo Clinic has published a study demonstrating that it has this potential. Nobody knows how common this is.

    Hi, Desia--

    Go to Pubmed.com and enter "cerebellar ataxia" and "gluten" and you will come up with the extensive work of Hadjivasilliou et al.

    Dr. Trumbower--

    Good to hear from you!

    Excellent distinction. I should have added: "Wheat makes women grow mustaches."

  • sr

    11/27/2010 4:09:37 PM |

    The new poster boy for the wheat industry:


  • Desia

    11/27/2010 6:10:41 PM |

    Thanks for the reply Dr. Davis.

  • Paul

    11/27/2010 7:11:18 PM |

    I fell off the wagon this Thanksgiving.

    All my family and friends completely reject the very idea of wheat abstention. Although, I did succeed in convincing my mom to go LC for a little while. She lost eight lbs. and two 1/2 inches off her waist in two weeks. She fell off the wagon soon after and quickly regained the weight. She said she was going to "try it" again.

    This holiday I was asked to two Thanksgiving meals and the usual villains where there in abundance; breaded turkey stuffing, thick-starchy gravy, puffy white butter rolls, and a variety of pies drowned in sugar.

    After 31 straight months abstaining from all things wheat, starch, and sugar, I succumbed to the prodding of my hosts to fully participate in the carb filled feasts (although I did so only in small portions.)

    By the time I got home later that afternoon, I felt so lethargic and foggy all I wanted to do was lay down and go to sleep. If I didn't know any better, I would have sworn someone slipped me a drug, but I knew it was only a reaction to the carbs, especially after being (at or near) a ketogenic state for so long.

    Instead, I got the dumbbells out and did some heavy lunges, presses, and pull-ups and I quickly felt much better.

    I think the adoption of wheat in western societies is so accepted and so prolific, and even highly revered and dispensed as a health food by medical and dietary establishments, the war for minds and bodies (literally) against this enemy is going to involve very long arduous battles.

    Oh, and I'll think very hard when ever again my family or friends offer up a bowl of stuffing, gravy, or butter rolls.

  • Hans Keer

    11/28/2010 5:23:49 PM |

    Thanks for the ammunition doc. My experience however is that apart from my partner, children and closest friends, second line relatives and friends are not so willing to listen to this kind of advice. Fortunately a lot of blog readers and Facebook friends are very willing to pick up the information (in this case http://bit.ly/cyKHre) and do something with it.

  • Anonymous

    11/29/2010 5:20:10 PM |

    One minor modification to the Salems quip:  Healthy whole grains are the "light" cigarettes of our age!

  • Freida Pinto

    12/2/2010 12:24:49 PM |

    Very good analysis for the diet, family. Really good. Go natural...

    Freida Pinto